Do you really want to change? If so, here are some helpful jumping-off points (in no particular order).
You need desire. Ask yourself, how strong is your desire for change?
You need a vision of a better future, an improved you. What do you see for yourself? Describe it with some excitement.
You need to have clarity about what needs to change and why. This provides more motivation.
You need a plan. You need a really good plan for changing a long-established habit. Most people don’t do much in the way of planning. You won’t drift or stumble or wander into change.
You need to go one day at a time for the next 60 days. You need a short-term and long view. Taking one day at a time is vital. But you need to hold in the back of your mind that you need 60 days for a change to really take hold.
You need a contingency plan to jump right back on the plan if you mess up. A mess up is not the end of your change, it is just a hiccup. Get right back on the horse and keep riding. You have already been changing. Restart, reboot, relaunch.
You need some friends to support you, to encourage you, to give you some accountability. Give them permission to give you some straight truth when you need it.
You need to pray. Ask God to help you. He will. Ask God for power, wisdom, faith, willpower, and a spirit of self-discipline. This is not a case of God helps those who help themselves, but it is where God says take responsibility and ask me for what you need.
You need to change your environment. Change processes are helped or hindered by our contexts. Make necessary changes. This one can be difficult, especially for the addictive patterns we want to break.
You need to eliminate triggers of the old behavior that needs to be changed. A trigger is the episode or thought or experience that starts the dominoes falling. The addictive-type habits have triggers, and sometimes multiple triggers. If those triggers are not eliminated, it is quite likely that the dominoes will fall.
You need to reward yourself. When progress is made, you need to celebrate milestones.
You need to recalibrate as necessary. You start with a plan, but you can morph your plan in a way that is best for the change.
These things help me make the changes I want.
What else works for you?
This wraps up a week of thinking about how we change.
May all the change you desire become your new reality.